me kay cooke

From challenge to change – behavioural insights for kids

Kids and their behaviours huh?

A crucial part of growing up is to learn that you are neither ‘good’ nor ‘naughty’, nor anything else for that matter, it is the behaviour that may be judged as good/naughty/useful or inappropriate.

When we value the person’s worth whilst challenging their behaviour, the child becomes enabled to make adjustments to their behaviour without having to defend any perceived assault on their core self.

Facilitating the child’s exploration of different perspectives about their behaviour, can help percolate many isights which can only happen when the brain feels safe to explore options. Insights and self adjustment help build self esteem, confidence and more choices around self regulation. Keeping behaviour separate from identity is a smart way to de-activate a primitive flight/flight/freeze response.

Here is a game I sometimes play with kids I coach, it’s called ‘What would (they) say about (behaviour)?’
Your hero

Mother

Father

Sibling

Teacher

Stranger

Best Friend

Another child in your class

A fly on the wall/alien

Someone very critical

Someone very positive & encouraging

There are no right or wrong answers, just perspectives to explore. Add some dice and cut out the words to create a game – the more fun and unexpected the activity, the more the brain produces dopamine and acetycholine – neurochemicals crucial to learning.

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