me kay cooke

What Can’t You Do?

How do you expand your child’s capacity for a ‘can do’ attitude?

Why is this important? Because when your child or teen says “I can’t…(eat that/do that/learn that)” it prevents them exploring what they can do.

Hearing someone declare a limitation ahead of real time capability-testing can be frustrating because it’s a sloppy recall of a failure-memory rather than imagineering-success. If you believe their ‘can’t’ you accept their limitation. Yet trying to persuade them that they ‘can’ do it (they ARE capable after all) so often engages a battle that sends them into the justification corner.

Helping children and young people experience more in life, not less, means they get to expand their mental map of what they can do with their brain.

This example from our Happy Brain programme, coaches a 10 year old child through an experience of high value to them. Gaming is the child’s value.  We’ll call the child Joseph.

“Jospeh, are you ready for more brain training tips to help you build more super mind-powers? Would you like to know a smart, simple way to feel more confident? How about being a more confident gamer?”

Of course, answering yes to this deserves congratulations because that’s a champion mindset attitude.

“Can you imagine feeling stronger and more confident while gaming?

Let’s do a mind experiment:

Using my PES scale 1-10 check how you feel as you say to yourself (out loud) the following statements:

measurement of emotions

I CAN become a more confident gamer.

I WANT to become more confident gamer.

I WILL become more confident gamer.

I AM becoming more confident gamer.

 

Which word (IN CAPITALS) helped you feel most confident?

Notice how these words drive an energy for you to move TOWARDS the choice of becoming a more confident gamer. How do you feel saying these words?

 

This is important because nothing in your life has changed, only your choice of language telling your brain which feelings will help you feel more powerful, clear and determined.

 

AND the reverse is also true, let’s try another mind experiment:

 

Using my PES scale 1-10 check how you feel as you say to yourself (out loud) the following statements:

 

I CAN’T become a more confident gamer.

I DON’T WANT to become a more confident gamer.

I WILL NOT become a more confident gamer.

I AM NOT becoming a more confident gamer.

 

Oh dear, these words drive an energy for you to move AWAY FROM the choice of becoming more confident. Instead the words tell your brain to reduce your choices. How do you feel saying those words? Which word (IN CAPITALS) left you feeling least confident? Crazy huh? How a few small words can change your feelings of motivation!

 

Again, although nothing in your life has changed, only your choice of language has caused your feelings (motivation) to flop towards less confident.

 

So which words work best for you?

 

Now you get to CHOOSE whether or not you deliberately drive your brain TOWARDS or AWAY FROM the feeling of confidence in gaming, or in fact, in any area of your life (school, hobbies, friendships etc). How do you feel about that?

 

Try this out:

 

I CAN practise developing my mind power.

I WANT to practise developing my mind power

I WILL practise developing my mind power

I AM practise developing my mind power

 

I CAN’T practise developing my mind power

I DON’T WANT practise developing my mind power

I WILL NOT practise developing my mind power

I AM NOT practise developing my mind power

 

Which words (IN CAPITALS) help you feel the strongest motivation?

 

I hope you’ve enjoyed this mind experiment. Why not try it with your friends at school and help them to realise how powerful their choice of words can be. Special agent Joseph, let me know what you discover!”

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